The soap looks like a Chia Pet
Their shaving razor needs an exorcism
She hangs her underwear like it’s a meat locker
The shower curtain is from Pier One’s Ebola collection
You’d rather get ready in a port-a-potty
You’re not sure the bathtub is off white or pee stained
The cleaning lady charges double to clean it
You actually feel dirtier after taking a shower
The bathroom has more mold than the basement
It always smell like someone did number two
